I am not sure who these people having sex are because I am not one of them and therefore cannot imagine having sex to this album. Money is for sexy rich people, specifically people who are having sex. Take nothing away from the fact that he is a pretty spectacular songwriter: there are amazing layers to each song and a building crescendo throughout the album (like sex? Maybe?) where every song seamlessly melds into the previous one: smooth, so smooth-but one gets the sense that he would rather “play doctor on your body” as he so eloquently puts it in “Sweat It Out.” When The-Dream suggests to me that in order to get my girl back I should “drop five stacks on a make-up bag” and lists some very nice brands in case I am unfamiliar with the hierarchy of high-end handbags, I am rather certain that this would not work with the women that I know-at least that’s what I tell myself considering I don’t have $5000 in regular income, let alone disposable income. However, his delightful bravado is what makes him incredibly endearing, and, apparently, quite good at fucking. He is a workaholic, as illustrated by the fact that he has production credits on every Rihanna and Beyonce megahit over the past three years, and as we know, working all of the time is not sexy. They are flashes of sexy that benefit from quick edits: one senses that if the shot lingers too long it gets awkward. He has a few dance moves that he relies on: a quick flick of the foot and then a grab of the microphone stand, a basic spin-move, an occasional punch towards the ground. He dresses in multiple layers, almost to comedic effect. The-Dream, otherwise known as Terius Nash, like me, is not very sexy. Additionally, I make a very modest salary. Sure, one might read about my dedication to physical fitness, my choice in a cologne with a strong bergamot topnote, my use of the parenthetical, my bravado in writing this ridiculous sentence and perceive me as attractive, but do not be fooled. Sexy, sadly, is not cumulative: in many cases it is something that is possessed or is not possessed, and no matter how much time I spend at the gym (a good hour-and-a-half for those curious) nor how well I write (I’m kind of okay) nor my obsession with cologne (currently Creed Aventus) I cannot achieve whatever it is that exudes the right perception of myself as an object of erotic desire. I have one or two flourishes that may seem surprising and impressive at first, but like a scripted moment in a videogame (videogame reference = not sex) they are unimpressive upon replay. The "Take You Home 2 My Mama/Love Vs Money/Love Vs Money Part 2" suite is one of 2009's top musical accomplishments thus far I'll definitely have The-Dream on my radar from this point on.Of the many adjectives one would use to describe me-some might even be positive-sexy would not be one of them. The album's singles, at times simply serviceable but often splendid, come bundled in together at the beginning of the set, then Dream moves on to move complex, though equally pleasant territory in the album's core. The album isn't studded with hits, instead, it moves in wonderfully varied, rapid-fire, hook-driven arcs. This is the most cohesive, focused R&B disc, conceptually, since Confessions, but The-Dream delivers a much stronger disc than Usher did. And I didn't like his first album, but I heard "Sweat it Out" and "Walking on the Moon" weeks ago and wanted to check out this disc. When his first single hit the airwaves I was not a fan. And I didn't like I was also really surprised with this effort from The-Dream. I was also really surprised with this effort from The-Dream.
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